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November 16, 2012 – Amos 5

Click here to read Psalm 114-115  on BibleGateway.com

There are a few phrases that fill every man with dread: “Sorry, sir, we are all out of hot wings”; “Honey, can you hold my purse for a moment while I run into this store in the mall?”; “I think we need to talk.” But all these pale in comparison to the icy stare of a significant other and the sentence of doom: “If you don’t know what’s wrong, I’m not telling you.”

THE GREAT MENTALO 

For you ladies out there, let me just clarify something. Men are not telepathic, nor are they good are reading body language. In fact, they’re not even that smart. The idea that somehow a man may know what you are thinking by using “common sense” is ludicrous, primarily because men don’t even they are supposed to be trying to figure out what you’re thinking in the first place. It’s not that they are lagging behind, it’s that they haven’t even turned the engine on yet. By the time you’re angry enough to punch a hole in the space time continuum, a man may have just noticed that you are not your usual perky self, which he will probably attribute to either your need for more football or a visit from your “friend.” The more reckless among manhood may actually suggest one of these alternatives, after which he will spend the greater part of his afternoon struggling to regain consciousness.

For you men, be of good cheer. God is not a woman. You don’t have to struggle to try to figure out what God values, nor to figure out what you should do. It does take some effort, as you have to actually read the Bible, but if you can muster enough energy to do that, you’re pretty much golden. Here, let’s look at an example.

WHAT IS IT YOU REQUIRE? 

Amos 5 lays out some of the most important things to God: Seek good, not evil; hate evil,love good, maintain justice in the courts; seek the Lord and live. It’s actually pretty easy. God doesn’t necessarily want our sacrifices, he doesn’t need our money, he doesn’t look to make sure we are following all the commandments and check off the ones we screw up each day.

Seek God, hate evil, maintain justice. Those other things will flow out of our love of God and our desire to do what’s right. It seems to me that we often get these ideas turned around. We try to do the right thing, and then God will come looking for us. But the Bible says our goal should be to seek God, to love our Creator and Lord. All the external stuff will follow naturally.

All that and no guess work. Not too shabby.

Oh, and if you menfolk are still wondering about “that other thing”: get some flowers, make dinner, and break out the foot massage. Don’t say I never did nothing for ya.

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